Oh la la la. Don’t worry, lovely, I’m working on the most outrageous post yet, one that involves this very scoop. Thanks for the heads up. Be sure to check back later for scintillating story.
xo xo,
gossip girl
Don’t worry, darling, an entire post on the current Upper East Side queen just went up, and it was just for you.
xo xo,
gossip girl
Hey people!
Hey there, Upper East Siders! Happy Monday everyone, whether you spent it in your hotel suite guzzling mimosas and catching up on Grey’s Anatomy, or whether you jetted off to Tijuana for some tequila and dirty dancing, I trust your weekend was utterly unforgettable. Since, recently it seems there is some interest being show in B, I’ve decided to let you in on the newest goings on in our queen’s new life. As we all know and are utterly dying with envy over, B is the newest face, CEO, and owner of Waldorf Designs. Her beauty, brilliance, and dictator skills do wonders for the company, and she has taken it to an entirely new level in fashion. She is such an unfairly gorgeous mogul, always strutting around in her six inch Louboutins, texting, tweeting, and screaming frantically into her iPhone, sipping her venti latte as she runs off to her empire. But, it’s not just beauty and brains that this queen has been blessed with recently, she spends her weekends with her devastatingly gorgeous husband, C and their miniature Bass, Henry, who is the most darling little boy ever. The three of them are seen all over Manhattan, they go everywhere, from the zoo, to Central Park, to FAO Schwartz, that family never misses an event. The only crack in B’s otherwise flawless life is the return of her gnarly eating disorder, which hasn’t made an appearance since her Constance days. My bet is she’s taking on too much too soon, just like when she used to load up on all those APs and still try to party as hard as her BFF S on the weekends. She tries to manage her stress with her daily yoga class at Pure Yoga but even two hours of stretches and refreshing MetroMint water can’t help this queen’s anxiety levels. Guess she’ll just need to find a new outlet, or she might find herself in an even worse predicament soon. But, before you worry your pretty little minds about our queen, just remember C would never allow for anything truly bad to happen to her. He’s going to be there every second, waiting with a fresh Magnolia cupcake, or steaming Belgian waffle, making sure B never misses a meal and is always properly nourished. That’s when you know it’s true love!
xo xo,
gossip girl
Lilly and Rufus back on NY Soil
The on again off again Upper East Side couple, Lily and Rufus have just returned to the UES, and this time, despite having left with separate people, they came back hand in hand. And I couldn’t help but take notice of the shiny rock that had returned to Lily’s left hand…hm, wonder what went on the city of love? A marriage, perhaps, or more accurately a REmarriage? Wonder how their freshly divorced kids will take the news. Family brunches are about to get awkward.
xo xo,
gossip girl
SPOTTED!
B leaving Pure Yoga all sweaty and glowing after a good class, her Mentromint Lemonmint water in her right hand, and her ever present iPhone in her left. It doesn’t take this queen long to get right back down to business after her de-stress time, does it?
S was spotted splitting a strawberry froyo with N at Pinkberry, the two were literally spooning the pink goop into one another’s mouths. It’s enough to make someone ditch their froyo and head for the bathroom with B. And the only thing more sickly sweet than their PDA was the gummy bears S topped the froyo with. N made sure S got the biggest container of froyo they had, because baby Archibald needs some sugary calcium, too!
C buying another scarf from J.Press, guess he lost his old favorite? Or maybe he’s just buying baby Bass a signature scarf of his own. After all, on the Upper East Side it’s never too early to learn fashion.
D drowning more sorrows into a glass of cold beer with Ivy. Those two are still up to something? Good news, I guess, that what they’re planning is well thought out, but I’m getting impatient! They’d better act quick before I lose interest all together.
xo xo,
gossip girl
N will be the best daddy on the Upper East Side, the only exception, of course, being his best bud, C. And that little baby will be born as Upper East Side royalty, something S’s baby would never be if her former husband, D were the baby daddy. No word yet about the gender of the sweet little Upper East Sider. But I’m betting we’ll know soon. And, regardless, this baby is going to be gorgeous, just look at the parents.
xo xo,
gossip girl
Spotted S and N finally moving in together. It’s about time those two made it official.
xo xo,
gossip girl
Hey, Upper East Siders!
How was your Easter? I hope it was as good as mine. But, while the kiddies gathered their chocolate filled eggs, and you indulged in too many mimosas, S was making some major life decisions. The recently wed Upper East Side it girl just ended her two year marriage with her former, now to be current again, stepbrother D. And only hours later, S was spotted moving into N’s suite at the Empire. Her blonde hair was blowing all about in the March breeze, but even in her ripped True Religion jeans and classic navy and white striped boat neck tee shirt, she looked like a model escaped from the runway. N helped her carry every last Louis Vuitton luggage case up to his suite, and then the two indulged in a late Easter brunch of waffles, whipped cream, and some bubbly. And by bubbly, I mean, ginger ale. Other than that, this Easter was pretty uneventful. Of course, B had one too many chocolate bunnies and was spotted in the bathroom again, getting rid of the extra food she indulged in, but C was waiting patiently outside, ginger ale in hand, ready to comfort his beautiful wife and give her the love and reassurance she needed. With someone as wonderful as C, I have to wonder, why the sudden need to regurgitate every morsel, B? Still looking for answers, and when I get them, you’ll be the first to know.
xo xo,
gossip girl
Aw, how sweet. S and N are practicing on Baby Bass before they get to the real thing, and eight months isn’t too far off…
Good Night, kiddies!
It’s time for Gossip Girl to turn in for night, draw a steaming hot bubble bath, light some lavender-scented candles, delve into that delicious stash of gold collection Godiva chocolates I’ve been saving, and catch up on my Netflix cue. But, don’t worry, there will be more gossip for me to report tomorrow, and you won’t miss a bit of it.
xo xo,
gossip girl
Yes, well, I find I’ve been much more inspired lately, there’s lots to report on the Upper East Side. And, besides, I knew you couldn’t function without me.
xo xo,
gossip girl
Spotted!
Spotted! B in Central Park with Dorota, C, and H. Now, it seems, feeding the ducks is a family tradition. How cute. S doing some self-reflecting while nibbling on some chocolate covered strawberries at Godiva. Sometimes a girl just needs her chocolate. N spotted trying on new looks at Barney’s. Wonder if he has an event he’s shopping for. Like a wedding perhaps? Or a congrats on your divorce dinner? D catching up on his reading at Barnes and Noble. Maybe searching for some inspiration, considering he hasn’t written a word in over two yeas. Well, you know what they say about heartbreak being best for the creative soul. Maybe he’ll be writing another novel sooner than he thinks.
xo xo,
gossip girl
Gossip Girl’s In-Depth Profile on Queen B
As requested by uppereastsiderrbitch93, I’m going to do an in-depth profile on none other than the queen of the Upper East Side herself, B.
Lives with: C , of course, and their darling son, Henry
Likes: Ruling the Upper East Side with an iron fist, and being a dictator of good taste
Dislikes: People who wear tights as pants, Brooklyn, and Dan Humphrey
Best Friends: S, N, and C, other wise known as the Non-Judging Breakfast Club
Current Crush: Her husband, C
Favorite fashion accessory: the headband
Favorite places in New York: Barneys, Bendels, Saks, Tiffany, the Met Steps, her Empire, Waldorf Designers
Favorite Music: Lana del Ray, Beethoven, Adele
Favorite Authors: William Makepeace Thackeray, F.Scott Fitzgerald, Ernest Hemingway, Edith Wharton
Favorite TV Shows: Downton Abbey
Heroes: Hillary Clinton, Ana Wintour
Motto: Tights are not pants!
Prince Louis is busy running his monarchy, but something tells me he has a scheme up his Armani sleeved jacket. Embarrassing his royal reputation may not seem like much to B, but, believe me, Monacco’s angry. So, what will Louis next move be? Only time will tell, and then I will.
xo xo,
gossip girl
